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IRRELEVANT INTRODUCTION

I think what I love the most in the whole wide world is this. Early morning, still dark outside, to sit in front of the fireplace with Sigurd, bear pup, drinking coffee, slowly. Looking at the flames. The crack in the glass (there´s a crack in everything ect ect) Dark shadows. Ashes. Embers. The way he leans his head up against my shoulders. The silence. I love that. I love this. The smell of the fire burning, the sound of the cast iron expanding.
November is so rich in colours, the golden grass and the deep green of the forest, as the light slowly, slowly returns to the world the colours almost quivers. I watch it through my windows. Heavy wind today. It might snow.

BACKGROUND INFORMATION

Old man said ” Well the interesting part is actually what you are going to write about now. So many stories out there about establishing something new, new projects, new stories, changes, changes it´s always about the changes. But what is your life going to be like now that you already did all that? How does it feel? You should blog about that”

I don´t mind taking advice from elders. It´s a new hobby of mine actually.
Too much wisdom is being thrown out with the bathing water, too many babies.
We can´t go around forgetting what it took centuries to learn. On the practical level: How does one live without all of the luxuries? How does one use the resources? How to cook, how to grow, how to harvest and build. So much knowledge earned through stormy winters and hard work. We can´t just forget that.
We are not allowed to just forget that.
I´m not saying we should do everything as they did. Absolutely not. We can make it better, improve, adjust, innovate- that´s what humans do, but we can´t just forget that everything we have…. is something we have because people FOUGHT for it. Bled for it. Believed in it. Carry on the fire.
Yes?
On the emotional level: Why was is so essential for our forefathers to build a nation with a good welfare system, a security net?
I think it´s because they knew that we NEED each other. On a real practical and emotional level (that can´t be replaced by any system, we´ve learned that)
No?
Please don´t forget that.

As of lately I spend a lot of time listening to my elders.

 

FILLER

After I quit social media my whole way of thinking have changed. As have my reading habits. What kind of author dosn´t read any books? Well. Me for one. I read social media instead. I dove right into it, head first. I wanted to read YOU. But somehow it all got corrupted, somehow the deep human need for connection and communication got distorted. We were bought and sold. We were manipulated. Social media have become a weapon and they took away that which could have saved us.

Makes me sad to think about.

I might be a weirdo living alone (with my family) in the forest. This might be because I´m an introvert or can´t cope with the stress of modern society, something like that, or maybe I´m angry. Like Thoreau was angry when he moved into the wild and wrote; “Most men live lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them”

Or Edward Abbey, a voice in the wilderness; “How to Overthrow the System: brew your own beer; kick in your Tee Vee; kill your own beef; build your own cabin and piss off the front porch whenever you bloody well feel like it.”

What I mean is: I might be weird and I might be angry about society (it´s an evil empire, run!) but you know why I write? Why I didn´t just turn my back to everything and engaged with “the simple life”, so pure, spiritual and whole?
Because I´m still into you.
I always where. Even Thoreau and Abbey were (they wrote books too) We all were. Always.

MORE FILLER

I believe this to be the true challenge of our day and age. The age of individualism and egoism is over. We know this. We know we need to connect and communicate to solve the mess that we´re in. On the deepest human level. The collective soul. Aren´t we flock animals? Don´t we realise that lately things have become seriously dangerous and we need to step up?
What we need to do now is to shape these vague contours, articulate, tentatively, that which have dawned on us.
We. Need. Each. Other.

THE PROBLEM OF ESSENCE

Personally I´ve been reading a lot since I quit social media. Turns out that´s pretty social too. Another kind of social. And I need it. Man, I´ve been in dire need!

I´m a fast reader but for years I´ve been even more than fast, I´ve been in super speed turbo mode; too quick to even read a book to the end, short sentences, please! Get to the point already! And how is this relevant for ME? As for articles: could you please stop doing irrelevant intros? Bitesize. Shareable; does this reflect positively back on me if I share? As for the bloggers like me “how do I make people share?”
The very ACT of sharing has become the goal. Not the actual content. Which I suspect is taking the deep need for human connection maybe a bit too far. It´s the human CONNECTION more than the actual message. It sounds beautiful only it´s not.
It makes us stupid when we connect without essence.
Look! Memecat!

FILLER

Impatient.
We have all become so impatient.
That´s what the elders say. In my books. In my books.

They say that if you don´t take the time that it takes to change… nothing is going to change.
They say that things take time.
They say that beginning and end is the same. That time is not linear and that destruction and creation are interwoven.

That´s what they say.
And I´m guessing they have a point. We talk about change all the time as if we could somehow just materialise it without any costs. Without bleeding.
I don´t think we can. To reach out and connect with others, like I have done for instance with my book… it bloody well killed me. The elders say it´s supposed to be that way. So suck it up already and get back onto your high horse. The battleground of our day and age is called “time”. To put essence into it. To fill it with essence. To expand it. To give it.

 

TIME
So here´s what I think. I think true rebellion lies in taking back our time. To TAKE time (not ask for it, like power it is not given away freely).
We might have gone a bit overboard with the sharing and the connection- dosn´t mean that this is wrong, I don´t think it´s a solution to isolate or turn your back to everything, I truly don´t. To be absolute truthful I do think that´s kind of cowardly or weak thing to do. So no. But to INSIST on some kind of essence.

INSERTED PERSONAL OPINION NOT DOCUMENTED
Maybe that´s why so many people in our time gets stressed, depressed, burn out. It´s the only way to reclaim time.
Only that it´s not an act of conscious rebellion more and act of frustration. They simply don´t HAVE more time to give. Maybe time is like air?

ABOUT TIME
So maybe we should keep on writing long blogposts without any (shareable snacksize) point.  Blogs takes time you know, both to write and to read, it´s a whole universe you enter.
Conection takes time. Real time.
To meet a lot. In real life. In real actual life. To take the time to do that.
To read books. To really read books. To comment. Engage. To write each other long emails. To insist on the content.
Wouldn´t that be worth something? Wouldn´t that be grand?

Anywas, that´s what I thinking this morning. Looking at the fire.

Over and out. I need another cup of coffee and also the screen light is making me dizzy.

10 comments on “Reclaiming time

  1. BeeHappee says:

    Oh Andrea, what a truthful piece, and so many thoughts there! T’s ” still song in them” – so beautiful. Tee Vee and pissing wherever you want, yes. I am struggling with “training” my 3 yr old not to just go wherever he wants (and he has done many times) as that seems to be just natural for him, but we will get arrested since that is how modern society goes.

    I regret I did not listen to elders when my grandparents were still alive. They had the wisdom and knowledge of all the social media combined. Now that they are gone, there is the lost generation of my parents left, they were ripped from the land and packed into little gray apartment buildings, ripped away from their roots, from the family, from the land. That was soviet policy. But same exact policy was executed in the USA, just under different names and with slightly different tactics. Same end result. Lost time. Lost knowledge. Lost patience. Lost souls. But I am really optimistic that it will all continue in the cycle. Like the fashion styles, right, the 70s came back, the 80s came back. With some modification. With community being online. With those who know what they are doing and already tested the waters sharing via blogs, books, classes. Instead of grandma showing how to spin wool, now I need to take my kids to spinning lessons. I do miss that extended family connection.

    Your article reminded of the one I read a while ago: http://aeon.co/magazine/culture/why-i-gave-up-living-in-an-off-grid-commune/
    A family who gave up living alone, because they did need human connection. I think about it a lot. I am at that crossroad to make the choice: land or community. Or is there a way to build both?

    Change and bleeding, yes, absolutely. In corporate world there is always acknowledgement of the disruption of change, the learning curve, etc. They talk about threats being neutralized. About phases, doing it all in phases. In personal lives change is often underestimated post factum, or overestimated and feared. Difficult to measure the level of “bleeding”. Maybe think in those business terms? You went through phase one. Now give it time. Time for learning and growing before attempting phase 2. Or just time to rest and hibernate during winter. 🙂

    And regarding time. Very practical question: how do you find time to write? What does little S do while you write? That is my struggle with time. 🙂
    Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and feeling, so much appreciated!

    Like

    1. What a wonderful article!! Thank you so much for sharing that Bee! It totally made my day!
      We have a spot like the mesa too. It´s the place where we built our first log cabin, the valley we had to leave. But I see it as the author of the article do: a training ground. An portal into this life. How wonderful to read about other such places, thank you again!

      (oh, time to write, yes… sometimes it´s hard, sometimes it´s not. Jeppe is a musician after four years in the woods he´s begun making music again, we both need time to be creative which means that we most both GIVE it to each other (or take it, depending on the day and the mood 😉

      Like

  2. Jojo says:

    If all movement stopped, there would be No Time
    If Earth stopped rotating round its own axis
    If Earth stopped orbiting the Sun (Son)
    There would be No Time
    Movement is Time
    We control Movement
    We control Time

    So what’s the big deal, you might ask?
    We do Not believe It to Be so, we Think it is an illusion
    It is NOT – We Are the Illusion

    What is the most true thing you have ever seen, felt or even contemplated? LOVE, unconditional LOVE is it not ….. being loved no Matter what – Feeling love no Matter what!!!!

    Love is Eternal – question is, do you want it!!!?

    Like

  3. Søren says:

    Atoms are vibration
    Matter is vibration
    Sound is vibration
    Words are vibration
    Music is vibration
    Light is vibration
    X-radiation is vibration

    Only so little of it is audible only so little of it is visible and still
    We believe nothing else exists … how arrogant, how ignorant!

    Andrea! Your message was receiver long before it was ever sent, cos all Is, allways – the ORDER of the elemtns is not important!
    Your Dream IS HERE, manifest – have faith!!!
    Not in God, but in your self
    We Are One!!!

    Like

  4. Many years ago, when I first started blogging, I thought that I might want to become a blog writer. I mean I really liked blogging, why not. I had learned that one way to generate more traffic to your blog was to comment on other people’s blogs. So I gave it a try. I was authentic about this, I only commented on the few blogs that I read (and really liked) and I meant everything I said. Yet it didn’t take me long to realize this didn’t feel right and I stopped commenting (and soon after realized that being a blog writer was not something I aspired to after all. blogland agreed). Looking back I can now see that the reason it didn’t feel right to make those comments was the intention behind them. I wasn’t commenting to make a connection with the writer or to thank them for the lovely words they took the time to write. It wasn’t about “us” or even “them”- it was about me. I see this so much with social media. I think about all of this when you speak about connection and essence. We must learn to reach out and make real, meaningful connections to each other- both in person and through technology.

    Recently I spent a morning with several other families helping a fellow homeschooling family work on building their home (that they have been working on for a year and will continue to work on for at least another year as they live in a bus/tepee through the winter). I kept finding myself overcome with emotion as I looked around at the scene before me- kids running and laughing as they disappeared in the woods, grown ups partaking in all sorts of odd jobs often well above their skill level (but also with smiles on their face) and all the while someone’s future home inching one tiny step closer to completion. Something about this combination of happiness, working together and building shelter touched something deep within me. I’m not even sure what my point is other then that it was one of the most beautiful examples of connection I have ever witnessed.

    How to connect over the internet- I mean really, really connect- this is much harder I think. But I do see glimpses of it here and there. Like you said, slowing down as readers and writers definitely makes a difference I think.

    Anyway, thanks for your thought provoking post today. It has been bouncing around in my head today and I thought you should know. And also, while I’m saying thank you- thank you for sharing your brave life with the world. I am new to your blog but find myself returning to some of your posts repeatedly. It’s lives and stories such as yours that are helping to make slow, tiny shifts in the rest of us.

    Like

  5. Your comment moved me a lot AmyMarie. The commenting on other peoples blogposts (or status updates). I did it. I did it to reach out but I also did it to gain attention. Somehow our connections gets muddy. I´ve been thinking about it as a problem versus quantity and quality. The good old capitalistic problem and now it seems to have invaded our personal spheres: more is more.
    More trafic, more hits, going viral…. has become much more important (for some people including me at one time in my life) than the actual content.
    So I´m thinking now that there is some kind of act of rebellion in insisting on the QUALITY of the connection.

    When I was a child we had this thing called the “pen- pal”. You could write to a total stranger (a real letter) in another country. Imagine the time we invested in these letters! For ONE single person to read!
    And then think about how efficient we have become now.
    Sometimes when I´m spending time writing a long email to another person I find that it is, in a way, a waste of energy or time or talent.
    Isn´t that…. (insert a lot of cursewords here)
    So I think we need to INVEST more in each other. Which for me (being a social phobic, introvert, weirdo, writer and little bit “public persona” too) is well beyond my limits of capability. Yet it seems to me that it would be the most brave thing to do.

    As for that moment you describe, adults helping each other, building, children running free in the woods…. I have seen that too, I have tried that, it is beyond compare. I think because it is more than “just” hanging out. There is a clear purpose, an existential dimension, it is CLEAR: we need each other. Maybe we could make that more clear. Maybe we could try.

    Thank you all for commenting!

    Like

    1. BeeHappee says:

      Andrea, how neat that you mentioned pen-pals. Funny, I was into that like you. 🙂 You are just a few months older (and few decades wiser!!!) than me. I can still remember most names and faces of my pen-pals, and often wonder where they are now. In fact, after years of letters, I visited my best pen pals in Estonia and Finland and that is when I fell in love with Scandinavia (well even though Finland is not technically part of it). And do you remember the illegal trick that pen pals passed on to each other about re-using postage stamps? 🙂 And how we waited for the new mail in our mailboxes, and how different and cool the envelopes, stamps, and post cards looked from each country. And the stories. For me, a soviet kid, it was all magical, the first glimpse into the world right after the borders fell.
      So thank you much for reminding!
      And I wonder if that stuff still exists. And someone made a business out of it (Little Passports), you can purchase a kit of a country for your kid, and they get letters from fake Sam and Sofia in that country. Well, kudos to these moms for the genius business idea, but what happened to the real stuff that was authentic.
      Anyway. Sorry for the long babble I just do not want to go fold the laundry. 🙂

      Like

      1. I hate the laundry too 🙂 I imagine what it must have felt like being a sovjet kid. Letters are and remain genius 🙂

        Like

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