The decision that we continue to make

We sit in the silence.

For a long time.

Meeting. Stress. No money. Flat tire. Parked by some cemetery.

I say “I´ll go get a job on a factory, I don´t care, I can´t take this anymore.”

He says “I think we use the internet as a drug to keep us distant and numb.”

We sit in the silence.

For a long time.

Then I say “I miss our first year in the forest.”

He says “Me too. We were hardcore back then. We´ve become fat, lazy and weak.”

We sit in the silence.

For a long time.

I say “No. Stop it!”

He looks up from down the black hole.

I say “We have to be pro-active. We know this. We have learned this. We have to take charge instead of hopelessly trying to catch up”

He nods.

We decide that we will continue to be poor. We know how to be poor. We used to be good at it.

Money is not the issue.

We decide to only open the computer in the evenings, after Sigurd have gone to sleep. We decide to never hit “refresh” over and over, never to seek love and approval from anyone other than ourselves.

We sit in the silence.

For a long time.

He says “It´s the fall. It always gets to us”.

I nod.

I say “This is a decision we will have to continue to make. Over and over again.”

He says “Yes”

We got home. We did this.









18 thoughts on “The decision that we continue to make

  1. You dont have to be poor Cuz of lack of money . There is à saying, ‘thé richest people are those whose pleasures are cheapest ‘ … And If you can enjoy something that is free, then you cant get any richer… I think… Peace!


  2. Thank you for sharing that this decision must be made over and over again. And the only way out of the hole is action. You are teaching those of just moving into our first year in the wild, that there will be a honeymoon, certainly, and after that the sometimes tedius, sometimes infuriating work of keeping it going (like marriage) year after year. But realizing that it is the committment (and the recommitting) that allows us to take the next step. Thank you.


  3. What a beautiful, rich bounty. Take time to look at the beauty around you! The colours, the satisfaction of producing your own food, the peacefulness around you allowing you to think… The glory of raising you son to be independent and proud of his parents! I have not said much to you but I read your writings and they always make me think. I am older. My children are all grown with families of their own. My husband and I have been married a long time and we are still very much in love with each other. We have a small house and a small garden. We grow a few things every year but I am unable to handle a large garden anymore or the canning, freezing and drying to preserve our own food. Time has taken it’s tole on our bodies. We are weak and sore and becoming increasingly frustrated we cannot do the things we used to. We refuse to give up though. With our little garden and house, we are rich and happy. Enjoy the world around you. It is amazingly harsh but the beauty and satisfaction make it beautiful at the same time. Every season has a reason to it. The spring is for sowing the seeds. The summer is the growing season, where not only the crops grow but so do you. The fall is for harvesting what you have grown and to look at your own life and take pride in your work. The winter is a season of reflecting on one’s life, family (here and gone) and a time to enjoy family. We also think of new things to make our world a little better, Some we can start in our time indoors and other ideas to begin again in the spring. Love life, each other and do not be discouraged. You have a rich and wonderful life. Enjoy it and each other and your family and friends!


  4. I so enjoy your writings, I love your authenticity, and I admire your courage in choosing this way of life for you and your family. Is there an english version of your book available?



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